Film-Tastic Friday Part Two: X-Files 2

 

The Truth is Out There...But Chris Carter Lost the Scent

Since both of the people I report to at work were out of town on Friday, I was given the day off. And seriously, what better way to spend the day than at the movie theater? After all, haven’t you ever wanted to be that person who hops from one movie to another?

When I was in Fifth Grade, I absolutely LOVED the X-Files. I mean, it was almost weird how big of a fan I was. Every Sunday night I would sneak past my little brother’s room to go downstairs and expose myself to some of the scariest, most thought provoking television a pre-teen nerd could handle. Anyways, the point is that I love the X-Files…a lot.

So when this movie came out, I decided that I had to see it. On opening day. So I did. And I left the theater pissed off.

This movie was so offensive to me as an X-Files fan that, even though I’m far from married, I kind of feel like I know how it feels to watch your wife get violated. I mean, that is how bad this movie is.

The greatest thing about the X-Files has always been that the characters question everything, especially the all powerful and ever-conspiring US Government. Aliens, high school hoodlums with extreme super powers, psychopathic serial killers, etc…the plotlines were always at least somewhat entertaining.

Not in “I Want To Believe”. There was hardly anything supernatural about this show. The only thing that could be classified as paranormal is the mind-boggling godawfulness of everything that happens.

This is all I’m going to say. If you’re an X-Files fan, don’t acknowledge this movie. If you’re not a fan, don’t go see this movie. It is simply a terrible film.

But if you like watching movies with pedophile priests combatting gay Russians straight out of The Brain That Wouldn’t Die (there are some serious parallels between X-Files 2 and this movie), then by all means, hawk over $10 to see “I Want to Believe”.